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"Revenge is the best way to get even."
- Archie Bunker
"One must think like a hero to behave like a merely decent human being."
- May Sarton
"Indeed, I think that people want peace so much that one of these days governments had better get out of their way and let them have it."
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
"Gaiety is the most outstanding feature of the Soviet Union."
- Josef Stalin, November 1935
"I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals."
- Winston Churchill
"This is no time to be making new enemies."
- Voltaire, on his deathbed, when asked to renounce the Devil.
"Get married: if you have a good wife, you will be content; if not, you will become a philosopher."
- Socrates, replying to a young man asking what to do with his life.
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
- H. M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.
"Television won't be able to hold on to any market it captures after the first six months. People will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night."
- Darryl F. Zanuck, head of 20th Century-Fox, 1946.
"Radio has no future, heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible, and x-rays will turn out to be a hoax."
- Lord Kelvin (1824-1907), British mathematician and physicist, ca. 1897.
"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943.
"ENIAC is equipped with 18,000 vacuum tubes and weighs 30 tons; computers in the future may have only 1,000 vacuum tubes and weigh only 1.5 tons."
- Popular Mechanics, 1949
"640K ought to be enough memory for anybody."
- Bill Gates, 1981
"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."
- Decca Records, rejecting the Beatles, 1962
"The band is OK, but get rid of the singer with the tire-tread lips."
- BBC producer in 1963, referring to Mick Jagger and the Rolling Stones.
"The bomb will never go off, and I speak as an expert in explosives. "
- Admiral William Leahy (Said to President Truman, when asked his opinion of the atomic bomb project)
"I don't know how they are going to fight World War III, but I know how they are going to fight World War IV; with sticks and stones."
- Albert Einstein
"There is no instance of a country having benefited from prolonged warfare."
- Sun Tzu (ca. 475 BC)
"If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done."
- Peter Ustinov
"In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance; in Switzerland they had brotherly love; five hundred years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock."
- Orson Welles as Harry Lime in The Third Man
"No matter what happens, the U.S. Navy will never be caught napping."
- Frank Knox, Secretary of the Navy in 1941, three days before Pearl Harbor.
"The airplane is an interesting toy, but is of no military value."
- Field Marshal Ferdinand Foche, later supreme commander of the Allied armies, 1911.
"Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master."
- George Washington
"If you take a feral dog and you feed it, and take care of it, and are kind to it, it will not bite you; I believe this is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
- Mark Twain
"An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind."
- Ghandi
"Be less curious about people and more curious about ideas."
- Marie Curie
"Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing."
- Wernher von Braun
"It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change."
- Charles Darwin
"Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them."
- Lily Tomlin
"Life must be lived as play."
- Plato
"Life is wasted on the living."
- Douglas Adams (said by the dead grandfather of Zaphod Beeblebrox)
"It's time for the human race to enter the solar system."
- Dan Quayle
"An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support."
- Fulton Sheen
"If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia."
- Thomas Szasz
"History is something that never happened, written by a man who wasn't there."
- Anonymous
"Hegel remarks somewhere that all facts and personages of great importance in world history occur, as it were, twice. He forgot to add: the first time as tragedy, the second as comedy."
- Karl Marx, The Eighteenth Brumaire of Louis Bonaparte (1852)
(Regarding the above quote) "And sometimes it's comedy the first time."
- Anonymous
"The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth."
- Niels Bohr
"When you only have two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one and a lily with the other."
- Chinese Proverb
"Congress is so strange. A man gets up to speak and says nothing. Nobody listens, then everybody disagrees."
- Boris Marshalov
"Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right."
- Woody Allen
"Lord, make me chaste - but not yet."
- St. Augustine
"The cable TV sex channels don't expand our horizons, they don't make us better people, and they don't come in clearly enough."
- Bill Maher
"To live each day as though one's last, never flustered, never apathetic, never attitudinizing - here is perfection of character."
- Marcus Aurelius
"It ain't a crime to be poor, but it might as well be."
-Kin Hubbard
"A fool and his money are soon elected."
-Will Rogers
"I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened."
-Mark Twain
"Rock and Roll will be dead by June."
- Variety magazine, March 1953
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