Take
the Trek sans fin: put the Eggbert helmet on, and "loose
the surly bonds of earth". As smooth as John Glenn's pate
and as buoyant as JFK's hubris, this mask's design will restore
the Alpha & Omega fatty acids of your innocence, and give you
the small "g" god's eye view of planet earth.
But watch out: once you've returned to terra firma, you may be seized by a grass roots movement and commit who knows what tree-hugging folly!